This is also something that’s confusing for a lot of people. The first thing to sort out is what you want a friend to do in your life. Are you looking for someone to have fun with? Are you looking for someone to tell secrets to? Are you looking for someone to help you with something that is hard for you to do? These are all different kinds of friends, and there is a different plan for how to find each one.
The second thing to sort out is how it hurts you when you think someone is your friend that isn’t your friend. Does the person you want to be your friend do all the same things for you that he or she is asking you to do for them? Is everything you do together safe for your body (doesn’t cause you pain or discomfort) your feelings (doesn’t make you afraid or leave you feeling “stupid”) and your mind (you understand what you’re being asked to do)? These things have to be true for someone to be a good fit for friendship. By being able to answer these questions, you might find it easier to figure out who in your life right now is your friend, and who isn’t. Also, keep in mind, someone may call them self your friend, but that doesn’t mean that you have to agree that they are.